Noughty Four

I'll delete this page in a week if no one touches it (16-Apr-2004) Well, this page got listed in the PoemsParodyAndFilkRoadMap.

======================================================= C'mon man, this stuff is way off topic, it doesn't belong here, and you're not supposed to restore your own page.. let someone else do it if they think it's on topic.

I'll claim it as on-topic and restore it, and parts as funny. (Sorry, not all of it. :-) -- DougMerritt

Sorry Doug, you don't count, since you're one of the evil people behind all that offtopic booger stuff! HaHaOnlySerious.

Hmm...I can't quite recall, but I think I did restore it once, perhaps...

This page is a bad pun on the year (eighties, nineties, noughties, NoughtyFour= 2004). It is a humour please page. Nah, it should also be open to general comments about what this decade/century/millennium should be nicknamed, funny or not.okay with AndrewCates...anyway pages are like children as soon as created you find youdon't own them anymore

My 2 year old started the morning the other day with "Daddy, I know I am good for cuddles and stories but what am I naughty for?"

Humour placed in NoughtyFour has to be reasonably good-natured. Poking fun at ethnic groups is allowed only if they are part of a first world country with a population of over fifty million (so the French are fair game: we interrupt for a NEWS ALERT: After the Madrid bombing, president Chirac raised the French security status from "run" to "hide": the only higher classifications being "collaborate" and "surrender"). However, true stories from smaller countries are allowed (such as the Nigerian newspaper headline: "three hundred headless bodies found in the bush: foul play suspected". Plots to overthrow the management of Wiki are not allowed.

Professional groups are not considered minorities (so reference to the London Yellow Pages which states: Boring - See under Civil Engineering) is allowed as is speculation as to why ONLY real civil engineers when this is pointed out to them feel it necessary to comment "of course, it is a different meaning of boring" in case the rest of us hadn't spotted it.

Particularly appropriate humour is that relating to children; such as the two year old who, having been told by granny that sucking his thumb would give him wind and make his tummy swell up, walked up to a heavily pregnant stranger in the Supermarket with the opening line "I know what you've been doing".

A mention could be given to the young nephew who recently approach his uncle with a request to sign the forms to open a premium rate (i.e. call recipient receives cash) phone line, since the phone company wouldn't allow a minor to do this... and then explained he planned to phone everyone in the phone book for a millisecond from it and cash in from the curious souls who checked 1471 (last called received) when they got home and phoned to see who it was.

However, information simply to provoke mischief elsewhere, like the fact that the Clerk of Works at Trinity College Cambridge leaves a complete set of master keys to the college in the top right hand drawer of his desk and that his desk can be reached at night using only door-flex on bolted doors and a single credit card; or a reminder that when opening a door with a credit card it is important to jiggle the door not the card, has no place here and will be ignored by other readers.

Do we solemnly declare to make mischief (apologies to Harry Potter)? No. We are NoughtyFour fun. Naughty is as naughty does after all. And, as every NoughtyFour year old knows, the only way to turn a bad joke into a good one is endless repetition.

AndrewCates