A whimsical unit of measurement, used to measure strength of emotional reaction. While the SI unit is "Peeve" (Pv), the millipeeve (and the kilopeeve, used when you're really pissed off), are quite commonly found. The title of the page is MilliPeeve, because that's a better WikiWord.
The Peeve is defined as follows:
The peeve is a linear unit of measure; an event rated at two peeves pisses you off twice as much as a one-peeve event.Zero peeves is the standard for no emotional reaction whatsoever. Negative peeves may be used to measure happiness. Originally, this use was not standardized (and was regarded as incorrect by metrologists), but the International Bureau of Weights and Measures officially standardized the definition of a negative peeve in 1953.
A few other events, and their rating in peeves:
- Turning on the radio, and discovering that your favorite station has undergone a format change: 130 peeves
- Receiving a piece of email, purportedly from eBay, informing you that your account has been closed: 10 mPv
- Discovering what happens should you be foolish enough to follow the directions in the aforementioned email: 3 kPv
- Getting to work in the morning, and discovering that the IT department has, by some rearrangement of the network configuration, broken the build on your project: 80 peeves
- When they inform you that whatever you were doing is nonstandard; and therefore the broken build is your problem: 240 peeves
- When your boss then brings up the broken build on your performance review, making it clear he considers the matter to be your fault: 2 kPv
And, a few moments of happiness:
- When you go to the shopping mall on a crowded day, and a parking place opens up just ahead of you, close to the enterance: -1 Pv
- Reading about SCO's latest legal humiliation on GrokLaw: -5Pv
- When you find a quarter in the coin-return slot of a payphone or vending machine: -140 mPv
- When someone cuts you off on the highway (or is otherwise rude and obnoxious) and is promptly pulled over by a police officer: -40 Pv
- When the obnoxious, tyrannical vice president at your company is suddenly and swiftly fired, and escorted out by security in front of the whole department. -4kPv
The related Imperial unit for emotional reaction is the wethen (wH)--pronounced as two words (i.e. "wet hen"). One wethen is retroactively defined in terms of SI units as equal to 1297.8942341 peeves, though 1.3 kPv is a common approximation used by laypersons. The aforementioned conversion factor only applies in the United Kingdom; an American wethen is slightly madder, at 1401.241231 Pv. Other Imperial units for madness, such as the hatter, are deprecated.
CategoryWhimsy
Milli Peeve