Respect Asa Zero Sum Game

Renamed from RespectIsaZeroSumGame

A rather pathological (in many ways) view of the concepts of respect and good manners. Rather pathological? Try completely moronic. Some folks view respect as a zero-sum game--if you respect me (or are somehow compelled to offer me respect), then I am entitled to (and should, as a matter of course), be disrespectful to you. Found in many social strata (such as some workplaces; also common in U.S. street culture) where the stronger party (the boss in the office, or the gangster with the biggest gun or largest "posse") demands fealty from subordinates, while treating said subordinates like garbage. RespectVsFear.

The alternatives are, of course:

A social structure where everyone is rude to everyone else (and this is expected); this actually can work (see NewYorkCity). New Yorkers are famously rude to each other (and to visitors), but because such behavior is the norm, nobody cares (except visitors unaware of NewYorkCity social norms). Respect, when given in such a society, is a high compliment.
- Clearly the author of the above has never actually lived in NewYorkCity
- New Yorkers aren't rude to each other; they're in a hurry. There's a difference. Furthermore, outsiders tend to have this opinion of NewYorkCity because when they visit they come to awful touristy spots like TimesSquare? where there's no sense of community. I live in NewYorkCity, and I go to TimesSquare? only once or twice a year. -- francis
A social structure in which good manners are expected to be offered symmetrically; everyone should be polite/respectful to each other, regardless of status. Lack of respect (here meaning mere indifference, rather than outright rudeness) is often perceived as an insult. (This is one reason that Americans and the French often consider each other to be rude; American tourists view informality as friendliness and act in a well-meaning, informal manner while traveling abroad; some French natives view this informality as bad manners and respond in kind).
Another option is giving respect only when earned. One variation is to initially give respect on the assumption that the receiver will earn it in time, but to abrogate that respect once the person has proven unworthy of it. This is similar to the optimal strategy for the PrisonersDilemma. [Note: The alternatives provided in the previous paragraph were alternatives to game theory. The option in this paragraph is merely a return to the game theory approach in the initial paragraph, hence it is not really a new option.]

The option in that last paragraph is certainly different from treating respect as zero-sum, so it seems to me to qualify as an "alternative". Further, I don't know what it means to say that any particular way of proceeding is "game theory"; you can describe any of the options on this page in game-theory terms, and you can describe any of them without game-theory terms. Game theory is a way of thinking about matters like this, not a particular result your thinking might lead to. I conjecture that whoever wrote that "Note" was a little confused.