Red Dwarf

[By the way -- does anyone know of some Red Dwarf content that doesn't require Java just to view it? The official site was created by someone who knows nothing of proper Web protocol when creating user interfaces, apparently.]

: It's cold outside
: There's no kind of atmosphere!

IT'S A GARBAGE POD!

: All alone
: More or less

IT'S A SMEGGING GARBAGE POD!

: Let me fly far away from here
: Fun, fun, fun
: In the sun, sun, sun.
: I'd like to lie, shipwrecked and comatose. Sipping fresh Mango juice
: Goldfish shoals nibbling at my toes.

[The above (minus the two "GARBAGE POD" quotes) is the standard opening/exit song of the show. Compare to "star ship Enterprise, who's five year mission..." ;-> ]

: Love is what makes us different from animals, Lister.
: No, what makes us different from animals is that we don't use our tongues to clean our own genitals.

: Last time, Lister, I only failed by the narrowest of narrow margins.
: You what? You went in there, wrote "I am a fish" four hundred times, did a funny little dance, and fainted.

Where in deep space did I get this traffic cone

For those of you who haven't figured it out from the above, and I salute you if you haven't, RedDwarf is a hilariously funny parody of the StarTrek genre. It stars a cretinous peon, an anal-retentive hologram, and a mutated cat. And that's the good part...

And don't forget the real star of the show, Holly, the not very bright AI in the computer....

Holly has an I.Q. of 6000. The same I.Q. as 6000 high school phys. ed. teachers.

...or 12000 traffic wardens

: Holly: "Oy!"
: All: "Oh, go away."
: Holly: "That's done it. I forgot what I was going to say."
: BAM!
: Holly: "Oh, that's right. A meteor's about to hit the ship."

"Today's been a good day. I ate five times, slept six times and made lots of things MINE. Tomorrow I'm going to see if I can't have *sex* with something." -- Cat

RedDwarf doesn't take itself too seriously. -- StephenHawking

: All in all, a hundred percent successful trip.
: But sir, we lost mister Rimmer!
: All in all, a hundred percent successful trip.

Through a bizarre set of circumstances, they're a grillion miles from Earth. They're trying to get back, even though it will probably take longer than many of them will live. There's also a main character who is a hologram, who in later seasons gets a fancy device that lets him wander around more freely. Does anyone else see a disturbing similarity to StarTrekVoyager?

Yes, Voyager also ripped off GallForce? (see janeway's hairdo at the start of the series, and compare it to Captain Eluza's. The difference? One of them has pink hair)

There are also four books that are based on the series: Infinity Welcomes Careful Drivers, Better Than Life, Backwards and The Last Human. They are not just novelizations of the show and are also very funny. The first starts off:

Explain, using diagrams where appropriate, the circumstances leading to your death.

Death isn't the handicap it used to be.

C'mon you re-e-e-e-ds!

Sounds like: RedCode

Some starting points:

"Smoke me a kipper, I'll be back for breakfast" - 'Ace' Rimmer

: "If you're interested, I'll be in my office covered in Taramasalta" - Bongo
: "I'm sorry bongo but I'm a strictly butter-side up guy" - Ace Rimmer
: "would it make any difference if it was... Humous?" - Bongo
: "I'm sorry Bongo, but lunch is on Millie" - Ace Rimmer

A.J.Rimmer Bsc (Bronze swimming certificate).

CategoryScienceFiction