Major Award

A trinket of minimal value, awarded (ostensibly) for some notable achievement. Used ironically.

 A: I heard you won a MajorAward for ten years of service.
 B: Yes, I've always wanted a coffee mug with the company logo on it!

Comes from the ChristmasStoryMovie, where the father in the movie enters a contest of some sort, and receives a telegram informing him he has won a MajorAward. Sure enough, a large crate is soon delivered to the house - containing (to his wife's horror) a table lamp in the shape of a woman's leg, complete with fishnet stocking. (Of course, the on-switch is up there under the miniskirt-shaped lamp shade!) Dad proudly displays this in the living room window for all the neighbors to see, proud of his great achievement. Said lamp is soon broken by Mom in an unfortunate "accident".

I've a neighbor (in Beaverton Oregon) who actually owns such a lamp, and displays it in his living room. He also has one of the (if not the) best set of (residential) Christmas lights in the Portland Oregon area. He's an electrician by trade, and reportedly has installed one or more extra circuits to his home just to power the Xmas lights...


CategoryHumor CategoryAwards


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