How To Talk To Business

I'm a geek who just blew an interview. For a really good job that I really wanted. And that I'd be perfect for. And that I understand really well. Because I didn't think enough about HowToTalkToBusiness.

To begin with, business is about relationships. If you don't begin an interview - or any meeting - by forming a relationship with business, business can't understand what you're saying.
To form a relationship with business, first you need to find out what business understands. Then you need to talk to that understanding. If you don't take the time to find out what business understands, or if you don't talk to that understanding, business can't understand what you're saying.
Next, you have to talk breadth-first to business. Yes, business wants you to find the path to the pot of gold. Yes, you know exactly where the enchanted fairy castle is that actually makes pots of gold. But if you give exacting directions to that castle, business can't understand what you're saying.
Business wants to find the castle themselves. So you have to give them landmarks and a map key. You know, N means north and S means south and those 3 mountains are called this, that and the other. If you don't, then business will turn east instead of west at the first fork in the road - and then no matter what directions you give, business can't understand what you're saying.
Once you've given landmarks, STOP. Wait. ListenWithQuestionRunning. Verify that business understand you. Realign your understanding or theirs until you and they agree on N and S and the 3 mountains. If you don't stop and wait, no matter what you say next, business can't understand what you're saying.
Business says, Okay, so now tell us where to find the castle. DON'T. Really, don't do it. Business does not want you to go off with your geeky list of directions - that's as bad as if you'd started out that way because, after the second fork in the road, business can't understand what you're saying.
Look at your watch. How much time is left? Not enough to help 'em get all the way to the castle? All you can do is say the castle is between this mountain and that mountain, but nowhere near the other mountain. That's progress; they didn't know that before. If you try to rush 'em the rest of the way with a shortcut they'll just wander off ... because they can't understand what you're saying.
Business doubts there's a castle there. DON'T insist there is because you've lived there with Guinevere for 15 long years and you could walk there from here with your eyes shut just by following her scent on the breeze. Explain why that's a good logical place for a castle to be built in the first place and how, if they were Arthur, that's where they'd put it. Guinevere means nothing to them - and if you try to explain her charms, they won't hear what you're saying.

Oh, sod the fairy castle. Look:

ListenWithQuestionRunning until you know you understand their problems and ideas. First.
Explain yourself breadth first. Slice up your ideas breadth-first before the meeting.
After you give them a horizontal slice, stop to validate and ReFactor their understanding.
Only start on the next slice when they ask a question that demonstrates their readiness.

Then they'll understand what you're saying and you'll know they understand what you're saying.

How fricken tiring. It sounds like dating, for God's sake! You'll use up your Geek Tylonol. Just build the damned thing for free and then the'll hire you for enhancements.

Um, it's a 10 meter tall, 65 tonne robot. Not easy to build for free. But, yeah, might work when dating. Or when dating 10 meter tall, 65 tonne robots. Is this one of the DatingPatterns?

But seriously the point is that, as a geek, it's easy to just lose your audience. You feel certain you're talking about deep and meaningful stuff. But they've zoned. They're not certain where you're coming from, they doubt where you're going to, and they have no idea where you are. The point of the protocol here is to prevent that from happening ... because once they get lost, you'll have the devil's own job of finding them again.

Was it a business-y job? I wouldn't think a technical person would need to go through any of that. -- MichaelSparks

No, it was a technical job. But it bordered on several of my favourite topics in software and math. First interview with head of development was lovely - he put in an immediate recommendation to hire. Second interview was intended to be a hail-fellow-well-met with the CEO. Which went well until CEO surprised me by introducing an apparently ill-read senior PM about half way through. By which time I was well up on my hobby-horse(s) and riding for the finishing line(s). If I had stopped, zero-based the conversation, and troubled myself to understand where these guys were at, then done as above, no worries, I'd have the job and plenty of time to get 'em where they need to get. As it was I don't think I communicated anything of value despite talking a blue streak on stuff that they honestly, genuninely, really need to know ...

Feedback 3 days later was, I quote, "we don't believe you're a good cultural fit for the team". Sigh. Back to the job boards ... ~ Pete

Pete, since I work at Google, and since Google has an office in Oz, maybe I can put in a pitch for you? I do not know if they're currently hiring in Oz, though. Would you consider relocating back to the US at all? --SamuelFalvo?

Kind of you Sam. I did contact google a while back but they weren't interested in me. Not certain how they make their decisions. But there's plentiful work in Oz, so no worries. I wouldn't move back to the US for quids.

MarchZeroSeven