Gummi Bear Secrets

Those who find GummiBearsConsideredHarmful don't know the secrets ...

You estimate in IdealEngineeringDay?s. But your management are a bunch of clucks who think it's your fault an Ideal day isn't a Real day. They don't know a policy from a metric. "It's company policy that our LoadFactor is a fraction smaller than 1."

So ... create a non-linear formula for transforming IdealEngineeringDay?s into GummiBearsOfComplexity. There should be an exponent in there somewhere. You don't want to show management some graph that shows 'em your LoadFactor has dropped from 2.75 to 2.73, and then try to pump 'em for a vacation. You want to show 'em one that shows your GummiBearFactor? has dropped from 1023 to 352, and that you damn well deserve a raise if not a medal!

Then if they ask where you got this marvellous LoadFormula? from, tell 'em it's standard industry practice as defined and peer-reviewed at the PortlandPatternRepository.

Think that's asking a little too much?

In this connoisseur's opinion, Haribo Gold Bears are the pinnacle of Gummi Bear confectionery. Somewhat difficult to find, but with a distinctive shape, subtle flavor, and firm texture. For maximum enjoyment, open the package and let age for a few days, mixing occasionally.

Take a Haribo Gold Bear (anything else is indeed a poor imitation) and lay it to rest at the end of the day in the bottom of a cup. Pour in an inch and a half of Coca Cola (full sugar, full caffeine version). Don't worry, you're feeding it, not drowning it. The next morning, when you look into the cup, please try and keep the screaming down - scary as it is, you are safe. (Unless you try eating it. Then you deserve what you get.) --StuartScott

Which one is, or have you listed just a couple of many of the GummiBearSecrets. When can we see more?

No, silly! Then they wouldn't be secrets!